I live in El Paso, Texas which is on the border of Texas and Mexico. Driving in certain parts of town it is easy to see over to Mexico. There are homes made of cardboard in some areas and homes made of ply wood. When I was a little girl I lived in Juarez, Mexico. I lived there four years. I do not ever remember knowing that we were poor, but now as an adult I know how much my parents struggled. When I was six my parents got divorced. My mom struggled to put food on the table. I never knew why my mom was always tired or stressed but I could feel it. At the time I was too young to understand, but now as an adult, I look back and I am so grateful for her efforts. We used to go to her friend’s house for dinner. I thought it was so we could play with her friend’s kids. We used to get clothing from my cousins. I thought it was because their clothing was cool and everyone did it. Three years ago my mom finally talked to me about why we did that. She did a great thing in finding ways for our needs to be met. I can say that seeing the struggle made me want to strive for better.
Aside from being on the border, El Paso is also near Ft. Bliss. It is common to be driving along some roads and turn to the side and see army vehicles. I have had friends who were deployed. When I was substitute teaching, there were certain schools that I was told were schools I should avoid. To my surprise, it was not schools were the children were in low-income areas or places I knew were full of gang activity, it was schools that had high enrolment of military children. I did not want to acknowledge that it was a problem. I enjoy challenges so I chose to work at those schools. At the high school and middle school level it was not as easy to tell which students had parents deployed, but it was easy to tell which kids did not grow up in El Paso. El Paso is primarily Hispanic so for the most part when you see someone with blonde hair and blue eyes you know they are not from here. Though with the older students it was not obvious, it was with the younger ones. I would often be left notes by the primary teacher. They would just say things such as please be aware that so and so’s mom is deployed. At times you may see her quiet or she may just need a hug. There was one child in particular who I remember vividly. I walked into the office to sign in and I heard the teachers talking to the administrators. This boys mom and dad had both been deployed and he was left with his aunt. His aunt was also being deployed and he was so worried about the deployment and where he was going to live that he was completely numb to everything around him. He did not talk to anyone or do anything. I did not have this child in my class, but I did see him and to me it was sad.
I think over all any instability in a child’s life can have negative ramifications. I have personally seen the effects of war and poverty. I do think that it is possible for children to overcome and move on. At times negative circumstances can have a positive outcome. People can overcome. It just takes a strong support system.
em827 